Hello my friends, and welcome to the podcast. This is the last episode of May 2022, my gods this whole month has been a tornado of astrological activity and it is not over yet. Mercury is still in retrograde until June 2, and we have the New Moon this Monday, so that’ll be energetic. We’ve just crossed into Gemini season, which I love. I actually enjoy Gemini season, and I like Geminis. I think they get a little bit of a bad rap, but they’re a lot of fun. So I think we should all give them a break.
I wanted to take just a minute to again thank everyone who supports this podcast. I really can’t express what it means to me. I am just one person, but I feel like the little coven we have created here is a community. And it’s one that I am so gratified and proud to be a part of. And everyone who has written to me or even just dropped a comment on a post, you just don’t know how it lifts my spirits. So, thank you. My inbox is always open, on social media at @middleagedwitch, and of course by email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Now, on to this week’s letter. This is a messy situation from a witch who I don’t want to name, because her circumstance is pretty unique.
I really enjoy listening to your podcast and hearing interesting ideas on how to incorporate witchcraft into my daily life-with intention instead of randomly or accidentally. I have been thinking for years about working a spell on my ex-husband and his wife-hear me out-I’m not really all about the drama!
Oh, girl. You had my interest, but now you have my attention.
So, I endured verbal abuse from him and got out when my daughter was 4, she is supposed to stay with him every other weekend but it has been less as she is getting older. She loves him of course, but now at 11 has started to see his patterns of big love and then not showing up. But his wife on the other hand has physically attacked me and my mother and I have a restraining order in place on her but it just applies to myself and not my daughter. She has done things to emotionally hurt my daughter, like making her climb on a bathroom scale to see her weight and then making faces to hurt her feelings.
I have gone the route of reporting to authorities when appropriate, entering us both into counseling, and DHS has been involved when they are needed. Most of the things are considered not harmful enough to warrant further action (thank goodness). But now I’m rethinking this baneful magick idea after hearing something you said. What if I willed him to get a job offer far away that he can’t refuse? I understand I need to be specific about a timeline and wording. But do you see that backfiring? She would still have a good relationship with her father, but it would be more difficult for him to disappoint her and her stepmother wouldn’t be able to pick away at her self esteem. And I wouldn’t be afraid constantly that she will physically hurt my daughter as well. I’ve exhausted all legal avenues at this point. Do you have any advice? Could I bind her from doing harm to my child? Thank you so much for your insight.
Ok, so for anyone who maybe hasn’t listened to the baneful magick episode, very briefly, I gave some pretty specific info on kinds of magick that could be considered harmful or destructive. I know this particular sort of magick is not popular in the love and light witch community, and I don’t take it lightly. But, I believe that everyone has a right to defend themselves, even if other witches don’t like how that makes witches, as a group, look. Sometimes, there really is no other way to get the results we want or need. And, my friends, this is precisely such a situation.
So, I’ve told this witch that I think a spell for ex-husband to get a job far away may be exactly right. She is perfectly entitled to protect her daughter from the emotional turmoil that her father is putting her through, and the gods know that this poor little girl needs to be far away from this train wreck of an evil stepmother. When I read the bit about the bathroom scale, I honest to god had to walk away from the computer for a moment. My blood was boiling. I’m getting angry again right now. So yes, let’s be very specific about the job we want him to take. He needs to go far away, and the job needs to pay enough that he will definitely accept it. And we want to also open roads toward this outcome and remove any obstacles in the way of it.
So including elements like willow, raspberry and some kind of supportive stone like agate or hematite to create opportunity, sunflower, sage, and myrrh to remove obstacles, and maybe marigold, clove and dragon’s blood for success. If you’re thinking of candle magick, of course white is always a solid choice, but a yellow or gold candle may be helpful, if you’ve got one. I also suggest road opener incense. I have found it to be very effective. In all kinds of work, not just this particular spell. But it’s inexpensive and it’s really nice to have around the house for any need that may arise.
As far as this stepmother goes, binding her from harming your daughter physically as well as emotionally is a great plan. Maybe fennel or garlic to guard against aggression and garlic is also great to deal with this woman’s jealousy of your daughter (which seems to have a lot to do with how hateful she’s being towards her, I just get the impression that this woman resents your ex husband’s relationship with your daughter), nettle to establish boundaries and set limitations with this woman, mustard and comfrey for enmity or hostility, thyme and cumin to repel her negativity.
I do also think it might be a good idea to invite your daughter to work her own spell of protection from physical and psychic harm. If you don’t want to tell your daughter this is meant specifically for stepmother, I understand. There’s enough chaos around this whole situation without telling your daughter, hey let’s cast at your wicked stepmother. But, creating a general protection spell from the harmful words and intentions of others could be very empowering for her. However she chooses to create this spell, she could do candle work, or a spell jar, or create a protective amulet that she can wear, she could even combine a few different methods to weave a very strong web of protection around herself.
And I don’t know if this particular witch works with deities at all, but maybe petitioning Hecate for assistance with all of this might be a good idea. Hecate is a triple goddess who has no trouble moving between protection and defense. She is a goddess of boundaries, and she is in particular a protector of children. She is also associated with intentions like success and travel, and I think she could be very powerful in all of this work, so it’s just something to consider. The work you are undertaking here is multifaceted, so she might be the goddess to assist in all of it. Hecate is absolutely powerful enough to assist in creating a far-away job opportunity, in binding this stepmother, and finally helping your daughter to create strong protective boundaries. Do your own reading and decide if this is something you’d like to include. I just thought I’d suggest it.
Please let me know how all of this goes, and I will be sending energies in your direction in the meantime. I want this to work.
Ok, now let’s talk about anointing oils. So, last week, I read a letter from a witch who mentioned that she had used the money-drawing oil recipe I had given in the Abundance Magick episode, and it kind of got me thinking. I have talked about making infused magical oils before a couple times, but I thought it might be helpful to do an entire episode on different kinds of oils that we can make to support our work. Infused oils are easy to make, they’re inexpensive (usually), and they are easy to adjust according to what we have on hand and what our exact intentions are. They are easy to use, they are versatile, and we can make as little or as much as we need. And these recipes make great additions to a grimoire. Infused oils are dead useful in spellwork, we can use them to anoint candles, we can add them to spell jars or mojo bags, they can be added to foods assuming all the ingredients are safe to ingest, we can even anoint ourselves.
And the basic process of making infused oils is to pour your carrier oil into a small saucepan and add a half teaspoon or maybe a teaspoon of each of your dried herbs, spices, or other ingredients, and warm it over very low heat while stirring it occasionally until it’s all heated through. Then just strain out the materials, let your oil cool, and pour it into a small jar or bottle and keep it in a cool, dark place until you need it. Always use dried herbs, fresh herbs will go rancid very quickly. If you only have fresh herbs or if they’re herbs from your garden (which is awesome and I encourage it), just lay out your fresh herbs in a single layer on a cookie sheet and put them in a very low oven, 170 degrees or so until they are dry and brittle. You can also use a dehydrator if you’ve got one.These processes take a little time and preparation, but it’s part of the working of spells.
So let’s go through some different intentions and we are going to talk about what kind of ingredients we can use to create custom infused oils that will support those intentions. And I’m going to, for the most part, try to keep the ingredients not basic, but definitely very common. I’m not going to list a bunch of herbs that are really expensive and hard to come by. And you can omit anything you don’t have and still create a hell of an oil. You can also do some research and add anything you have on hand that I may not list here. As always, my goal is to make the craft accessible. I want witches to try new things, I don’t want witches to feel discouraged about spellwork because they can’t find or can’t afford certain specialty herbs.
We will start with the money drawing oil that Kristin mentioned in her email from last week. For this oil, the carrier I use is olive oil usually, to which I will add basil, dried orange peel, cedar, chamomile, clove, comfrey, dill, ginger, mandrake, mint, nutmeg, pine, and sesame. You can look online for other herbs that work for money spells, and you can leave anything out that you don’t have or don’t wish to use. I will also add a little allspice and dried rose petals for luck, depending on the situation. And if I want this to work quickly, I may also add a little cinnamon.
Once this oil is cooled and everything has been strained out, I add to this oil literal money clippings. By that I mean I will get an actual dollar bill, cleanse it with smoke from either sage or incense, and then I’ll bless and sanctify it for the purpose of calling in more money to me. Try to find one that has repeating numbers in the serial number if you can, preferably 7s. And then once it’s blessed, I cut it into confetti sized pieces, basically. I’ll add a pinch of the clippings to the oil, it doesn’t require a lot. You’ll be able to do several spells with one dollar bill. And you can use those clippings in mojo bags, you can burn them, if fire spells are your jam, you can add it to spell jars, whatever.
Money drawing oil made during Gemini or Taurus season is especially powerful incidentally, and if you can align the full or waxing moon with the preparation, that’s good too. Otherwise, making this oil on a Saturday, Sunday, Wednesday, or Thursday will also be beneficial. Now, if you do work with deities, you might want to invite a deity to bless this oil, you could leave it on your altar with some offerings. Deities associated with money work are Demeter, Juno, the Dagda, and Pluto. So maybe do a bit of research and find out what your chosen deity might appreciate.
Good sleep oil is something that’s really helpful during especially stressful times when the mind won’t just let us relax. This is something that can be applied to the wrists, the throat, the temples, we can draw sigils on the skin before bed. We can apply this to candles as well. I prefer to use a vitamin E oil or a sweet almond oil as a carrier, because if we do apply it to our skin right before bed, it’s probably going to be right after we’ve showered, so we may as well use an oil that is going to help soften our skin. And I hope it goes without saying, but we aren’t going to want to ingest this. Some useful herbs for this oil will be apple blossoms, peppermint, thyme, which is especially potent for warding nightmares, rose, chamomile, and of course lavender. And then, if you have a small piece of amethyst, or some amethyst chips, you could add those right into the bottle once you’ve strained all the herbs and bits out of the oil. Deities associated with sleep include Selene, Luna, and Angus.
Now for love oils, we’re going to talk about three different kinds of oils. But in general, for any of these love oils, it will be most potent if it’s made on a Friday or a Monday, and full moons are also preferred when possible. First, we’re going to make an oil for calling in or attracting love. And for this, we will want to add yarrow which is excellent for attracting the attention of people that we want, clove, and either whole cloves or ground cloves will do, rosemary, ginger which is excellent for heating up a spell, just generally speaking, and also catnip which seems like a weird addition but is actually very common in love spells and it works well in oils.
The second oil we’ll discuss is meant to give some mojo to an already existing love connection, and there are a lot of common flowers that we can pick from the garden to dry and use in this oil. Rose obviously, but also daisies, carnations to deepen the relationship, honeysuckle for devotion, and violets to discourage anyone who might try to interfere with the relationship. Aside from flowers, marjoram might also be added to increase happiness, sandalwood, and mustard, either the whole seeds or ground mustard will do.
And then the last love oil we will talk about is for lust. So for this oil, we like cardamom which is a very lusty spice, also cinnamon, ginger for heat, jasmine to enable a spiritual connection as well as physical, and hibiscus, if you’ve got any.
And the deities that might be most helpful for any of this kind of love and lust work are of course the usual suspects, like Aphrodite, Venus, Eros, Cupid, Adonis.
Banishing oil, ok, banishing works are traditionally done on a waning moon, and also on Saturday, so however you like to time that is up to you. I want to suggest for this oil some Witch Hazel. Witch Hazel is a plant, but it’s not overly common, however, you can find Witch Hazel solution in grocery stores. It’s just witch hazel that’s been distilled in water, and as a bonus, it has several medicinal applications, so you can add a few teaspoons to your oil, and then keep the rest to use in other ways. It’s a good astringent for oily skin, it’s great for using on cuts or abrasions to prevent infections, it can be gargled to help soothe a sore throat, and what else, oh it’s great for inflammation. In particular you can apply it to a sunburn for relief and to help the skin heal.
But back to our oil. Herbs and plants for this work might include basil, which is very protective and is also used in exorcisms, so it’ll definitely banish whoever you have in mind. Pine needles are wonderful for driving away evil and negativity, garlic is super potent for banishing work, pepper, either ground or whole peppercorns, and I’m going to throw in star anise as well. It acts as a natural pentacle and therefore endows your work with the protective qualities of a pentacle, and one of those properties is of course to drive away negativity, and salt for purification.
Another note on banishing oil is that everything in this oil will also function beautifully as a protective oil. So if you don’t need to banish anyone or anything, consider making some of this anyway and consecrating it for protection instead.
Manifestation oil is a pretty general-purpose kind of oil. So we will want to kind of throw everything and the kitchen sink into the oil, and then as we use it for manifesting very specific goals, we can add those specialized ingredients at that time. Witches have different opinions about the best moon phase for manifestations, as we’ve talked about before. Some witches like a full moon to encourage all the might and power of the moon phase, and some prefer a new moon, so that as the moon waxes all the way through all its phases, we build the power of the manifestation to its fullest potency.
My advice is to pick one. Both of those schools of thought are valid and they both work, so just decide which is your favorite and go with it. Now as for which herbs to include, I am going to say up front BAY LEAVES. Bay is an absolute powerhouse for manifestation. So is rosemary. Rosemary is very versatile, but in terms of what it does best, manifestations, baby. I would also add chamomile and patchouli, and finally dragon’s blood resin, which is a little more specialized, but this is an oil we can use over and over again, and I do think it’s worth the investment, if you have the means. If not, don’t fret. Bay leaves are probably already in your spice rack and they kick ass at this work, so you’re still going to get excellent results regardless.
So once your manifestation oil is made, keep it on hand and then as you need it, you’ll grind up a few herbs for the specific manifestation. So like, if you’re manifesting healing, you’ll use your oil and add like, some goldenseal or elderberry or, you know, St. John’s wort or something. So that’s how we use that.
Road opening oil is one that I love. It can be used in combination with a lot of other oils and with a lot of different spell work. We can use this oil in money drawing work, or in love spells, and of course manifestations. The purpose of this oil is to help to remove any obstacles or blockages to our desired outcome, as well as to help to create opportunities for us to get the result that we want. So this oil can really be made any time, although we might consider the waning moon to assist us in removing any blockages. So, sunflowers, either the petals or the seeds will be good here for their optimism and ability to enable desires to come to pass, sandalwood for wish fulfillment, sage to create opportunity, bay again for its ability to make things happen, and finally rosemary and myrrh to give the whole mixture extra power.
And that’s not an exhaustive list of all the different oils we can make to support our magick. We can make customized oils for any purpose, the intentions I’ve covered here are just really common, multipurpose oils and again these can be customized any way that we like. I’ve listed some herbs and ingredients for each intention, but let us never forget that your best source of magick is yourself. So if there’s something that comes to mind for your personal intention, by all means, add it to your oil, add it to your spellwork. It will help to personalize your results and it’ll make you feel more connection, and more ownership of the outcome.
I hope everyone enjoys the new moon this Monday. If you live in the States, I hope you enjoy the long weekend. Please drop me a line anytime about anything. We will talk again next week, it’ll be the first episode of June and the last day of Mercury Retrograde and good riddance to that. Although Mercury will still be in its shadow for a couple weeks afterward, I’m not thinking about that right now. Thank you for joining me today. My name is Eli, and this has been the Middle-Aged Witch podcast.